Category Archives: Inspiration

What’s Your Favorite Food?

On Monday night before going to bed, I sat there and thought to myself for a moment…. “I think I have an addiction…”.  My mind began wandering back to very early days in my childhood when I would be asked, “What’s Your Favorite Food, Marcia?”.  I never had an answer for anyone.  My mother would like to claim that my favorite food is Steak & Potatoes though.  (Love you Mom!)  As that is what she would typically end up telling people.

We’ve all had that question asked.  From MySpace & Facebook “All About Me” postings, surveys, questionnaires, etc.  But, let me ask you this.  Did you answer that question truthfully?  Or, did you just put something down that was tempting you at the moment?

Here’s what I was thinking before bed on Monday…..  I don’t have ONE specific food that I like.  I like THEM ALL!!  I like anything that tastes well, smells well, looks well and sits well.  I want it and I want it NOW!  That’s when it really hit me.  I am a FOOD ADDICT!

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I honestly have never been able to specify what my favorite food is.  I could tell you that I absolutely LOVE Mexican food (which I do), but honestly… I would eat the heck out of Cheesecake or Seafood just as passionately.  (Hmm… perhaps that’s a term I need to share with the therapist — Food = Passion.  Interesting what comes out here sometimes.)

Fast forward to Tuesday.  I’m on the computer scrolling through my Facebook posts like I typically do and there is a blog post from Ruby Gettinger (if you haven’t heard of Ruby — You need to go check her out!  She’s amazing!).  I click on it and start to read it.  It grabbed my attention as she starts to talk about how we become “Powerless to ______ ” (fill in the blank with whatever you feel powerless to).  Then, she encouraged me to take Step 2 and join her in getting some help.  I clicked on the link and was directed to The Recovery Room.

I really wasn’t sure what to think once I landed on the page for The Recovery Room, but something within me forced me to take the next step and e-mail the moderator to be added to the group.  I received my e-mail confirmation within a few minutes and before I knew it, I was attending a 3pm Overeaters Anonymous virtual meeting.

I decided early on in the session that I was not ready to “share” my story or talk about my issues.  So, I just hung back, listened and cheered on those who were so bravely sharing their trials and tribulations as Compulsive Eaters and Food Addicts.  My mind was racing and I swear the hair on my neck was standing straight up.  Every word that was typed across the screen from each member felt like it was coming straight out of my own mouth.  For once, I had found where I needed to be!

I have been telling my friends and family for several weeks now how I had this mental block that was preventing me from losing my weight and I just kept praying that I would eventually figure it out.  Am I going to have some remarkable weight-loss all of a sudden?  No, I’m not saying that.  What I am saying is that I have found a way to discuss my emotional and mental issues with the one thing that keeps me FAT besides my own self… FOOD!

Of course, this group doesn’t just sit and talk about food.  In fact, we aren’t even allowed to discuss a specific food or diet for fear that we may cause someone with an extreme food addiction to go into a rage of sorts.  We don’t want to be the reason to set them into a binge episode.  So, we just use very “vague” terms when discussing our food addictions.  Like, “I went to this specific restaurant and had a really hard time staying away from this specific meal that I had prepared myself to avoid”.  I loved how comforting and supportive everyone was within the group.  (Again, it’s all a virtual chat room.  So, it’s very easy to share, support and speak freely.  Especially when your screen name is “guest”.)

The most interesting thing I learned about OA is that they use the Alcoholics Anonymous Big Book.  Yes, The 12 Step Program!  Because if you really think about it… it’s ADDICTION we are fighting!  The same “suggestions” (as the AABB is all suggestive and not a mandatory way of life) apply for ANY addict.  I’ve already downloaded my copy of the AABB and plan to read more of it throughout the next few weeks.  (It never occurred to me how similar a “binge drinker” and a “binge eater” were similar until I started reading…)

So all and all… I’m suggesting to YOU… my family, friends and fans.  If you are struggling with an addiction, a battle with yourself or are depressed about something that has happened in your life.  Get Help!  It does NOT make  you a weak person to admit when you need help.  In fact, it makes you STRONGER!  Come back ALIVE and LIVE the life you really want!  Get the help you need!  Because we want to see you around for a LONG time!

Sending you all ((hugs)) while you are tackling this journey to a healthy you and struggling with day-to-day battles within it.  I know personally that it is not easy, but we will make it through TOGETHER!  Stay Strong & Healthy!

 

About OA:

Overeaters Anonymous offers a program of recovery from compulsive eating using the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of OA. Worldwide meetings and other tools provide a fellowship of experience, strength and hope where members respect one another’s anonymity. OA charges no dues or fees; it is self-supporting through member contributions.

OA is not just about weight loss, weight gain or maintenance, or obesity or diets. It addresses physical, emotional and spiritual well-being. It is not a religious organization and does not promote any particular diet.

OA members differ in many ways, but we are united by our common disease and the solution we have found in the OA program. We practice unity with diversity, and we welcome everyone who wants to stop eating compulsively. Welcome to Overeaters Anonymous. Welcome home.

 

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A Work in Progress

Yes, I’m still on my road to losing this pesky fat!  I’ve been extremely busy since about mid-February.  I went back to work after being off for nearly two years.  (I took a “mental break” after my last miscarriage)  I was on a roll losing my weight with being down nearly 15 pounds from Jan 2nd to Feb 13th.  I figured it was time to move on.  Boy was I wrong!  This damn scale of mine was resisting to budge for nearly three months.  It hit me this week that I just haven’t been making the time for ME as much as I should have.  However, I have jumped back on the bandwagon and I am hoping to get below the 220’s next week (I started at 248 in January)!  I created a six month goal for myself to be down 50 pounds by my 35th Birthday.  That’s drawing near — June 14th — Eeeek!!  Since I took my first photo of myself on January 19th, I figured I’d be a little lenient and go to June 19th to reach my goal.  Of course, I won’t be saddened if I reach it before then.  🙂

On May 7th, I will be giving up my reigns once again as Nanny.  I’m going to be concentrating on myself this summer and preparing my body to go through another round of infertility treatments.  (I haven’t shared it with most of my family and friends — so I apologize if you are reading this and are just now finding out)  I am going to tell you all this… I’m scared as hell nervous and anxious to begin the process.  Most of all, in my current state — I’m not ready!  My goal was to be below 200 pounds before even going to see the specialist.  Our appointment is May 20th.  I just told my husband (literally like 20 minutes ago) that I am rescheduling that appointment… once again!  This time, not because I am too frightened to begin treatment, but because I have a bigger goal in mind.  I want to be below that 200 lb mark!  I want to be a healthy pregnant momma!!  There’s nothing I have ever wanted more!  (Small Note:  I will NOT be posting on this blog, Twitter, or Facebook when/if I do treatments.  You will find out I’m pregnant when I feel I’m ready.  Not trying to be rude, but just protecting myself, my husband and so many other couples who go through the struggle of infertility every day of every year.  I will not be that person who keeps throwing it up in conversation just for conversation.  I have been there and I won’t be doing it!  So, you are still safe to hang around.  Long after the “fun” begins!  🙂 )

I have my Best Friends wedding on May 18th and when I return I will be kicking it in high gear till at least my birthday.  Then, I will see where I am.  (Hopefully below the 200 line!)  At that point, I will contact my specialist (Reproductive Endocrinologist) and go from there.  And hey, who knows!  Maybe I’ll just have a miracle pregnancy!  Psh!  Ha!  Ya, I’ve been saying that for 7 years folks.  (Read MY STORY to find out more)

Tomorrow morning I am joining my new friend and journey buddy (Geri) for Boot Camp.  Yes, I’m going back!  Well, this one is with a different trainer, but I need to have my ass pushed a little harder.  I have NO CHOICE!  Staying fat is not an option for me!  I’m also continuing with my weight-loss challenge group and have recently started a local “Women’s Fat Club”.  I am expecting a call on Tuesday afternoon from a Therapist who specializes in Food Addiction and Binge Eating.  We are hoping to have her come and speak with us ladies.  We also have a cooking class (at our local Diabetes Center), a field trip to see Ruby Gettinger and a Splash ‘N Dash Fun Run scheduled over the summer.  Strength in numbers folks!  I encourage you to grab a few friends and get yourselves moving this summer too!  Get out and enjoy your life!

Ok, now for the good stuff (blech!).  Here’s my progress photo’s….

Apr2813 update

Not a whole lotta change yet (slightly here and slight there yes), but there will be soon!  You just wait and see!

**Do you have a progress photo, journey story, etc that you would like to share with my readers?  Let me know (by commenting below or contacting me via PM on Facebook) and I’ll post it on my blog for you!  I love to share others stories!  Be an inspiration to others and you will keep inspiring yourself.

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Happy Easter & a Update

In case you missed my posts on Facebook this morning….

Easter 2013

 

 

March 31 2013 - Updated Side-by-Side

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Checking In :: Or, Maybe I’m just venting….?

I guess it’s been awhile since I’ve updated.  So, I thought I should get on here and do so.  Let’s see… where to begin?!  (Warning:  This is going to be all over the place…)

I’m still teetering around the 228 lb mark.  I’ve lost 20.8 pounds since January 2nd.  Not too bad, but I would REALLY like to get myself into ONEDERLAND sooner than later.  For some reason, the taste of onederland is causing me some extreme weight-loss anxiety.  I’m having battles from “What to Eat?”, “What workout to do?”, “I don’t feel like logging”, “Why won’t my friends come work out with me”…etc etc.  I know it’s nothing more than just in my head, but it’s really starting to piss me off!  I know some of you are like “Quit Complaining” & “You’ve lost, what more could you want”!?!  Blech!  That’s all, just Blech!

I really need to find some new workout sessions/classes.  I think maybe I have hit boredom?  I also need to either find a personal trainer or a group of friends who will work out with me.  Perhaps loneliness?  The main problem, I live about 45-minutes to an hour away from everyone.  😦  Not good!  But, something needs to change.  Maybe I’m just scared that I will “Give Up”?!  I think that’s the ultimate right now.  I know I won’t entirely, but unless something snaps…. I’m heading for a full blown sabotage.  Yikes!

Oh, did I mention that I have started working again?!  I have.  I love it!  The job is flexible and the family is ultra sweet.  However, I’m noticing that since starting I have slowly become “lax” with my journey.  I need to maybe find some better time management skills in the process too…

I don’t know what’s ultimately going on… but, I think I’m overwhelmed.  Therefore, I’m starting over.  I’m going back to week one.  NO CARBS, NO SUGAR.  EAT VEGGIES & FRUIT often and LEAN MEATS.  Also, NO DAIRY or EGGS.  I’m planning to do this for at least two weeks.  I’ll report back afterwards and let you know if this is just the kick in the ass that I’ve been needing.

Here’s what I have on the plan for the week too….

Monday:  Workout @ Planet Fitness (Hoping to meetup with Friends), OFF today

Tuesday: AM Walk @ Home & Weights,  Work 4-11/12

Wednesday:  Work 12-6, Dance Class 7pm

Thursday:  Work 9:30-3:30, Evening Walk @ Home & Weights

Friday:  8am Yoga, 10am Gym,  OFF today

Saturday:  OFF  — Gym/Walk @ Home

Sunday:  OFF — REST DAY

MEAL PLAN…..

Breakfast Daily:  Green Monster Smoothie
Snacks: Fruit, Veggies, Nuts
Lunch & Dinner: Lean Meats (Tuna, Turkey Breast, Chicken Breast…) & Veggies

If you missed it.  Here’s my Bridesmaid Dress that I picked out yesterday.  This is a little reminder that my hard work is actually working.  Somewhat.  Maybe.  😉

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So, What do you think?!

On a positive note, I have added some small items of encouragement.  I am signed up for a 4% Biggest Loser Weight-Loss Challenge.  I have 22 Days to lose another 6 pounds.  I know I can do it!  I also signed up to walk the Susan G. Komen 5K with my Mom on Mother’s Day in Chicago.  I’m really excited about this one.  A 5K through my favorite city?  Yes please! It should prove to be a good & healthy time.

Alright, I must go prep for the week.  In the meantime, check out this cool website I found today.  http://www.FitnessBlender.com.  It’s absolutely FREE to sign up on it and they have TONS of FREE Fitness Videos.  You can even do a search based on what type of workout you want.  Say you wanna tone your arms (like me!)…. you just search “Toning” “Tri-Ceps/Bi-Ceps”.  It’s as easy as that!

Wishing you all a fabulous week!  Enjoy!

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Don’t Give Up!

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Hey Y’all!  I hope you are having a GREAT week so far.  I’m getting myself back on track and NOT GIVING UP!  I spent the last few weeks surrounded by bad food, bad choices and bad people.  Now it’s time for ME!  I’ve got my week going pretty good so far.  Here’s what I have in store…

Today:  Dance Class

Tomorrow:  Do 3.1 miles at the gym and weights

Friday:  Yoga in AM.  At least 2mi walk at home in the PM.

Saturday:  At home/gym 5k and weights

Sunday:  Do “something” active with the hubby & pupster.  (Weather permitting, I’d like to go for a walk on the beach or do a local trail.)

What do you have planned for your workouts this week?  What roadblocks have you had along the way?

**My personal goal for this week is to be able to run at least a 1/2 mile non-stop.  I’ll keep you posted!

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Call 9-1-1 …. I have a FOOD COMA!

Dude… You got Dessert?!

So, yesterday started off on the right foot.  Our 62 yo housemate returned home this week.  (Long story, but she is here temporarily.  And, we LOVE having her around so it’s no big deal.)  She took me to her Aerobics class yesterday after talking me into it for months now.  For $1, I figured I’d give it a shot.

I arrived to a gym filled with grumpy men and anxious ladies all above 50 years old!  (Ha!)  Funniest part, the lady next to me tried to tell me that I was doing a move wrong at one point and ended up causing the entire line to run into each other.  Ha!  Serves her right!  (Just kidding!  I’m really not that mean!)  I was surprised at how I could get myself to sweat during an “extremely modified” aerobic session.  I guess all my years of Jazzercise helped me to accommodate pretty much any workout.  To say the least, I will return next week for $1 and to hang out with my fellow new 50+ friends.  (Bonus:  They have weight-lifting afterwards for FREE.  Woot Woot!)

After Aerobics, I agreed to help her with some items of importance.  Like getting paperwork from her storage unit and getting the contacts on her old phone transferred over to the new one.  (That’s a whole ‘nother subject.  I’ve been teaching her how to use a phone since Monday.  Of which, I told her NOT to get.  But anyhow… 62yo’s are like talking to Teenagers sometimes.  Geesh!)  Well, she ended up getting entirely turned around on the way to the storage facility.  So, the plan to eat at a nice Salad/Soup Restaurant went straight into the dumpster… and so did my diet.  The next turn was a THAI Restaurant!

It’s probably been a century since I have visited a Thai Restaurant.  I had no idea what to order and couldn’t think fast enough on my feet to plan for something low-fat/low-sodium/low-cal…etc.  I went with my GUT (and not figuratively) and ordered the Wide Pad Thai Noodles with Brown Gravy, Chicken and Broccoli.  Ya, I did post that I was only going to eat 1/2 of that plate.  Ya RIGHT!  I ate the whole damn thing!!  Can you blame me?!  I’ve been eating clean (veggies, fruits, meats, etc) for the last 22 days.  Set some “gravy” and rice noodles in front of me and this “fat chick” ain’t going to control herself.  I ate it all and LOVED it!  (And of course, I felt like passing out right after we got into the car. Damn Carbs!)

I knew I had plans to visit my friends that evening at the local Ale House.  Therefore, I think the reason for me being upset at the Thai Restaurant was because I had planned to eat healthy at lunch and bad at dinner.  So not the case here…. at all.  You’ll see why in a minute!

I downed my Herbal Tea and Water the rest of the day until it was time to prepare myself for my Ale House adventure.  6:30pm, I walked into the door and was greeted by my hubby and my friends at the Ale House.  After spending an entire day with a 62yo discussing Social Security benefits (Eck!)… I ordered a BEER…. then, an order of Spinach Dip with Chips… and then a Hamburger with Bacon, ‘Shrooms and Provolone on a WHITE bun with Yellow Mustard and a side of Sweet Potato Fries… and then, ANOTHER BEER!  O.M.G….. Call 9-1-1… Marcia is going into a FOOD COMA!  Thank GOD for my hubby being there and not ordering anything of his own.  He helped me tear apart my feast.  Thankfully.  The beers must’ve numbed me, because I didn’t even consider a dessert.  Or maybe I did…. it’s not the point here.  Or is it?  LOL!  Good Lord…

So, today… I wake up.  Massive Allergy Attack (I am only to assume it’s from the nastiness I ate yesterday) and step on the scale…. I swear it looked like this….

HELP Scale

I went up 1.4 pounds since YESTERDAY!!!

I’m not going to tell you my weight exactly.  Mainly because I am in a challenge and I don’t want to announce any weight standings till Sunday (as that is what everyone else is doing as well, it’s only fair that way).  Basically, I’m beating myself up today.  I feel like the scale and the hamburger are playing the “Rocky Theme Song” and dancing with each other!

I’ve decided to skip the Yoga class today.  Instead, I will head to the gym or take the pupster on a walk later this afternoon.  My 62yo has left the building for a few hours.  So, I think I will take in the moment and enjoy some FREE time on the couch and allow my nose to open up and the allergy med’s to take control.

My promise to myself though…  I will NOT repeat yesterday this week.  I will NOT allow myself to have another FOOD COMA this month.  I’m not saying that I will never have a Food Coma again.  I’m saying that I am not allowing myself to fall ass backwards into my old eating habits.  If, by chance, I have another day like this in the future.  No biggie!  As long as I go on the next day with healthy eating habits and good exercise… I’ll be proud of myself.  Bad Days happen to Good People.  I’m not going to let it define me.  But I still wish it would have turned out a little differently.

Here’s hoping that the scale is kind to me on Sunday!  And a little funny to take us out with.  Enjoy and have a GOOD day!

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My Cheat for the Week….

These truly are IMMACULATE!

 

Last day before my hubby returns back to work after being off since December 22nd.  I haven’t cooked one day since… so, I felt it necessary to cook him a nice breakfast.  Typically, I would have purchase a WHITE FLOUR version of cinnamon rolls, made them all and ate half of them — WITH ICING!  This time, I did things a little differently.  I took one slice of the roll, sprayed my waffle iron with non-cooking EVOO spray and layed it in there.  Two minutes later, I had a warm chocolate chip WAFFLE!  Yum!  I topped it off with some butter (literally a scrape and nothing more), lite maple syrup and added blackberries & strawberries on the top.  Also, I had to have my morning Yogurt too!  😉  When I was done making mine and his — I threw that damn can away!!  Who needs the rest??  We don’t!  And, I didn’t get to the bottom of the can where the icing was, so I had to get rid of the thing — QUICK!  I don’t feel guilty for this simple pleasure, things could have turned out so much worse.  But, like everything — consume in moderation and you will be fine.  Now, to do 50 squats….  Have a great day!

**Oh, did I mention I’ve lost 4.6 pounds this week?!  =)  Check out the update in progress.

 

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