A Work in Progress

Yes, I’m still on my road to losing this pesky fat!  I’ve been extremely busy since about mid-February.  I went back to work after being off for nearly two years.  (I took a “mental break” after my last miscarriage)  I was on a roll losing my weight with being down nearly 15 pounds from Jan 2nd to Feb 13th.  I figured it was time to move on.  Boy was I wrong!  This damn scale of mine was resisting to budge for nearly three months.  It hit me this week that I just haven’t been making the time for ME as much as I should have.  However, I have jumped back on the bandwagon and I am hoping to get below the 220’s next week (I started at 248 in January)!  I created a six month goal for myself to be down 50 pounds by my 35th Birthday.  That’s drawing near — June 14th — Eeeek!!  Since I took my first photo of myself on January 19th, I figured I’d be a little lenient and go to June 19th to reach my goal.  Of course, I won’t be saddened if I reach it before then.  🙂

On May 7th, I will be giving up my reigns once again as Nanny.  I’m going to be concentrating on myself this summer and preparing my body to go through another round of infertility treatments.  (I haven’t shared it with most of my family and friends — so I apologize if you are reading this and are just now finding out)  I am going to tell you all this… I’m scared as hell nervous and anxious to begin the process.  Most of all, in my current state — I’m not ready!  My goal was to be below 200 pounds before even going to see the specialist.  Our appointment is May 20th.  I just told my husband (literally like 20 minutes ago) that I am rescheduling that appointment… once again!  This time, not because I am too frightened to begin treatment, but because I have a bigger goal in mind.  I want to be below that 200 lb mark!  I want to be a healthy pregnant momma!!  There’s nothing I have ever wanted more!  (Small Note:  I will NOT be posting on this blog, Twitter, or Facebook when/if I do treatments.  You will find out I’m pregnant when I feel I’m ready.  Not trying to be rude, but just protecting myself, my husband and so many other couples who go through the struggle of infertility every day of every year.  I will not be that person who keeps throwing it up in conversation just for conversation.  I have been there and I won’t be doing it!  So, you are still safe to hang around.  Long after the “fun” begins!  🙂 )

I have my Best Friends wedding on May 18th and when I return I will be kicking it in high gear till at least my birthday.  Then, I will see where I am.  (Hopefully below the 200 line!)  At that point, I will contact my specialist (Reproductive Endocrinologist) and go from there.  And hey, who knows!  Maybe I’ll just have a miracle pregnancy!  Psh!  Ha!  Ya, I’ve been saying that for 7 years folks.  (Read MY STORY to find out more)

Tomorrow morning I am joining my new friend and journey buddy (Geri) for Boot Camp.  Yes, I’m going back!  Well, this one is with a different trainer, but I need to have my ass pushed a little harder.  I have NO CHOICE!  Staying fat is not an option for me!  I’m also continuing with my weight-loss challenge group and have recently started a local “Women’s Fat Club”.  I am expecting a call on Tuesday afternoon from a Therapist who specializes in Food Addiction and Binge Eating.  We are hoping to have her come and speak with us ladies.  We also have a cooking class (at our local Diabetes Center), a field trip to see Ruby Gettinger and a Splash ‘N Dash Fun Run scheduled over the summer.  Strength in numbers folks!  I encourage you to grab a few friends and get yourselves moving this summer too!  Get out and enjoy your life!

Ok, now for the good stuff (blech!).  Here’s my progress photo’s….

Not a whole lotta change yet (slightly here and slight there yes), but there will be soon!  You just wait and see!

**Do you have a progress photo, journey story, etc that you would like to share with my readers?  Let me know (by commenting below or contacting me via PM on Facebook) and I’ll post it on my blog for you!  I love to share others stories!  Be an inspiration to others and you will keep inspiring yourself.

The Break Down (Week of 1/21/13)

As you learned in my Call 9-1-1….I have a FOOD COMA! post, this past week was not my best to date.  I had a couple of “cheat” moments that definitely lead me down a path of self-resentment for a few days.  Thankfully, I am back on track today!  Somewhat…. I’ll explain later.  For now, how about a little re-cap of last week?

Monday:  Boot Camp almost killed me this past week.  She made us RUN!  Did you hear me?  SHE MADE US RUN!!!  Ok, maybe she just made us run down the one side of the church to the dumpster and back — TWICE!  But still.  My body was screaming pretty loudly at 5:30am.  Sadly enough, I was also the slowest.  😦  I’m ok with that though.  I’m the big girl on campus…. for now!

Tuesday:  I took the day off.  Sat around in my PJ’s ALL DAY and played on my Kindle and watched TV.  It was great!  It was my first true “Pajama Day” since starting the new lifestyle.  Figured I owed it to myself (if only I had known what the rest of the week would have looked like).

Wednesday:  The day started off good with me waking up, loading up on apples and water and heading out for a Aerobic Dance class with our 62yo House Guest.  Boy, I was literally the YOUNGEST person in the gym filled with at least 50 over 50yo’s.  But hey, for $1, I’ll be going more often!  Well, after class is when the day went steadily downhill.  My driver (let’s call her “Canada” to protect her identity), she got a little turned around and we ended up in the wrong direction to her storage unit (we had a lot of errands this day).  So, our original plan to stop at a small soup and salad joint was busted.  We ended up walking into a Thai Restaurant instead.  Then, that night…. I had dinner with friends at the Ale House.  Again, see my Call 9-1-1….I have a FOOD COMA! post for more details.  I’ll just sum it up with this photo….

Thursday:  Besides beating myself up.  Thursday was another lay low day and I ate pretty decent.  Looking back, I wished I would have gotten off my A** this day and worked out.  But, you live and you learn.

Friday:  Uh yes!  Finally, I talked myself out of my depressive state.  Ha!  I headed to the gym (as I really wanted to sleep in and not get kicked back down at Boot Camp) and ran Day 1 of Week 1 of the Couch 2 5K program.  I also did my arms on the weight machines.  To reward myself, I went out to our local farm and purchased some veggies and had a nice quiet lunch with me, myself and I.  It was WONDERFUL!  =)  This really helped to lift my spirits.

Saturday & Sunday:  I didn’t do much in the terms of “working out” this weekend.  However, I did manage to finally clean off my desk in our extra room.  That desk has been piled with the past for the last 6 months.  I finally went through it all and trashed most of it.  I am now sitting here at a nice clean desk and able to have MY own space back in the house.  I’m in LOVE!  On Sunday, hubby and I went to our local farmers market.  Didn’t get anything; as I got so much on Friday.  However, it was nice to scope out the prices and see what they have available for next time.  I’ll definitely be back.  Afterwards, we headed to the grocery store and then to pick Strawberries!  YUM!  I have enough strawberries to get me through the week with my smoothies and just general snacking.  I should have got more, but there’s always NEXT weekend!  🙂

TODAY:  Ok, I have another confession.  On Saturday night, I decided to enjoy a small slice of a loaf cake that “Canada” had purchased at Fresh Market.  It had been staring me in the face all week.  Let’s just say, my body is NOT happy with it!  I’ve needed to be near a bathroom for the last 24 hours. (Sorry, TMI, I know.  Deal with it!  I’m only HUMAN!) I guess there is the slight possibility it could be a stomach virus, but I don’t think so.  I’m starting to figure myself out.  So, I had to skip Boot Camp again.  It was the last day of my pass today too.  😦  It’s ok.  I made a pact with myself.  Get down another 20 lbs and we can sign up for another round.  I think I’ll need it once I hit a plateau anyhow.  (Yes, I do talk to myself.  Don’t judge!)  In the meantime, I am going to train for my first 5K.  My husband and I are going to WALK one on February 9th.  The first big RUN 5K will be April 7th.  I’ve got PLENTY of time.  If I can tackle the 5K, I may even upgrade to the 10K at the race.  🙂  So, my plan today was Boot Camp.  That got blotched, then I decided to do the gym C25K program, that got blotched… so I just stayed around the house and walked 1.51 miles with the puppy instead.  I went strong for the first mile.  The last half, I had to slow it down a bit as my stomach was starting to shine its awful face at me.

The upside to having a stomach issue — Down 1.8 pounds on the scale in 24hrs!  HOLY F###!!  Why couldn’t I have weighed in at that yesterday??  Errr.  Oh well, this weeks weigh-in should be pretty decent.  Watch out girls!  😉  Currently, I am down a total of 12.8 pounds since January 2nd!!!  WOOT WOOT!!!  Enter Happy Dance….

I’m going to leave you with a little quote I got while at Tory Johnson’s Spark & Hustle Business Conference last year.  It’s one of my favorites and it will be my theme this week.  Feel free to take it for yourself too!  Have a fabulous one!

Do Not Let Your Fire Go Out,
Spark By Irreplaceable Spark…
The World You Desire Can Be Won.
It Exists…. It Is Real… It Is Possible…. It Is YOURS.
~ Ayn Rand

Boot Camp :: Day 1

Well, I survived my first day of Boot Camp!  I wasn’t really sure how I was going to do.  Started with last night.  I ate dinner and then went to bed.  Took me FOREVER to fall asleep!  I don’t typically go to bed before 11:30pm and last night I made myself start trying at 9pm.  Then, I started having a little anxiety about attending the Boot Camp.  To top it off… we have a well at our house and we are on slab (we live in the boonies!), my husband decided that it was a fabulous idea to kiss me goodnight and then start a load of laundry and run the dishwasher all while having the living room TV on blast and yelling at the dog for getting in the trash.  I honestly thought it was a (‘scuse my language) f’ing joke for a minute!  Finally, I got up, opened the door and yelled — “I’m trying to SLEEP!  Can you shut off the f’ing washers!  The well keeps booming in my ear every 2 minutes!  Geez!”… and then I slammed it back shut again.  Ha!  Thank Goodness my hubby rolls with the punches.  😉

So, I did manage to wake up at 4:15am after all!  I got dressed and began to load myself with water and a 1/2 an apple; as instructed by my trainer via e-mail.  I packed my bag, laced my shoes, set my GPS and headed out into the dark (might I add friggin’ cold) morning.

My destination led me to a VERY dark Presbyterian Church parking lot.  It was me and ONE vehicle that pulled it.  I was a little leery.  Eventually, she turned on the light in her car and my worry subsided.  More cars began pulling up and then one whipped into the parking lot like batman and a man jumped out in his sweats.  I gathered, this was my trainer!  So, I got out of the car, grab my things and started heading towards him.  He met me half way, shook my hand and introduced himself.  “Hi, I’m Alan.  Your trainer.  I’m going to kick your butt today!”.  WHAT??!!!  The funny part, my natural response was to laugh.  I don’t know this guy, I’ve never seen him before, I’m sitting in a dark parking lot with a blonde lady and a muscular black man for all I know.  Ha!  Thankfully, he chuckled too!

Once in front of the church, I noticed we weren’t alone.  There were four women standing on the drive-way in front of the front door… in front of the only light for miles.  They had their mats rolled out, hand weights out and water bottles ready to go AND they were stretching and marching in place.  Alan touched me on the shoulder and said, “I don’t expect you to keep up with everyone today.  Do what you can”.  Wow, I was really surprised by that.  I was expecting him to PUSH me and push me HARD.  But, I was happy to hear that. We began our work-out with high knees and then followed with side lunges, ice skater, side jacks, mountain climbers, planks and a few more things that I can’t remember names for. It was a lot like the drills I use to have when I played Volleyball in Junior High.

I quickly found out that the blonde was a guest trainer who was there to teach us the interval portion of the boot camp.  She taught us 45sec moves with a timer.  I got to about 20/25secs before I puted out.  Alan was still sticking to “cool” though.  He kept coming over and making sure that I was in good form, told me to take 15 secs here and there for a water break and kept checking my pulse.  Once, he even told me to stop because he was too worried that I was over-doing it.  He also took time to ask me when the last time was that I worked out, what my current diet was and discussed an option for a detox/diet and said he would e-mail it to me later today.

Over-all, my experience at Boot Camp was very pleasant.  The trainer is amazing!  I am guessing it wasn’t just a “first time” show either.  As he was being very similar with the gals who have been there longer (for awhile from what I gather).  And did I mention that he reminds me of Dolvett on The Biggest Loser?!  Both in looks and personality.  Which, I am so happy about!  I was watching TBL last night and thinking that if I were to be on the show, I would want Dolvett.  Because I feel he does the best to MENTALLY prepare and coach each of his clients. Losing weight is a constant battle that we hold with in ourselves.  I think there’s an equation out there somewhere, but I’d have to guess and say that it’s something like —

Weight-Loss:  25% Diet + 25% Fitness + 50% Healthy Mentality = A New You

I’m applauding myself on the back today.  I took another BIG step towards getting myself healthy today.  Yay me!

What I’ve Learned From Today:

• Go to the bathroom before arriving at Boot Camp.  There is no bathroom and working out on a full bladder SUCKS.
• Don’t eat anything more than a 1/2 apple before camp.  That was the perfect amount and it didn’t come back up.
• Get a new bra!  — I’ll save you from the details.
• Not all trainers are mean.
• Get more sleep!